A Good Look At Anxiety And How To Cope With It

When I was very young, every night before school, I would feel sick to my stomach thinking about going into class the next day.

This habit carried on into my teenage years. At night, I couldn’t sleep. During the day, I felt constantly on edge and would over-analyze every situation. I would worry about scenarios that hadn’t even happened. I would over-think just about everything.

The funny part is that my mind led me to every worst-case scenario when, in reality, none of those things actually ever came true.

I didn’t realize it at the time. But after growing into adulthood, it wasn’t hard to see what I had been suffering from all these years.

Anxiety.

It has become a word that we dread. It is the lingering phantom that we can feel coming on, always hovering above or finding its way into the cracks between our thoughts.

In this day and age, anxiety has become one of the most common conditions among our society. In fact, it affects 18.1% of the entire U.S. population alone. It is a common term that is used and yet, unfortunately, many people fail to understand that anxiety is actually a mental disorder.

So many times throughout my life, I have had people tell me to “stop worrying” or to “get over it.” Looking back as an adult, I now realize how much these seemingly harmless words were only making things a thousand times worse for me.

I wanted nothing more than to feel “normal,” as they put it. And being told that I was worrying too much or overreacting made me feel more and more isolated from “normal” people.

When you suffer from a mental disorder, there is no on or off switch. It doesn’t just go away and it certainly isn’t any fault of your own for having it. Yet, many people who don’t understand all of the ins and outs of anxiety tend to believe that we can control it. That, in a way, it is our fault for “letting it happen.”

Let me stop you right here to say this: anxiety can be controlled– to a certain degree. Obviously, someone who gets the right help for it is going to learn ways to cope with it more than someone who never reaches out or simply doesn’t realize that they have it (like my younger self). Notice that I say “cope” because when it comes to anxiety, it is something that you may always be battling with and there is no knowing when it can hit.

The truth of the matter is that people with anxiety tend to feel more isolated than the average person. I’m not saying that every person who suffers from anxiety has the same experience. But when it is severe enough, anxiety can isolate you from family, friends, partners, or any kind of social setting.

I cannot count the amount of times I have dropped my plans last-minute because I just could not bear the thought of going out in public.

Sometimes anxiety can feel crippling, and sometimes it is nothing more than a whisper in the back of the mind, a constant reminder of its presence.

Having experienced anxiety first-hand, I am here to tell you that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Anxiety is a mental disorder, but that doesn’t mean it has to run your life.

Now, I’m not in the medical field, nor do I claim to have all the answers. But these are just a few examples of the methods that have personally helped me cope with anxiety. Hopefully they can help you in some way as well.

 

1. Meditation

We’ve all heard of it. Yet, few of us have done it. Meditation has been known to have amazing results on calming the nervous system, relieving stress, and helping people develop an overall healthier mindset. With all of these benefits, it’s hard to deny that meditation might just be the route to go. All it takes is 5-10 minutes a day (more if you’d like) to start you on your way.

There is a great app that I have recently adopted into my daily routine to help me get more accustomed to meditating. It is called Calm and it has done wonders for me. There are many different guided sessions of meditation, each one focusing on all of the unique emotions and experiences that we all go through. It also has meditation songs and sounds that you may use in a timed, silent mediation, depending on your preference.

2. Exercise

Another well-known stress-reliever also happens to be a great anxiety-reliever. Exercise is so beneficial, especially for those of us who suffer from anxiety. Exercise takes your mind away from whatever may be eating at you throughout the day, and puts you on a track towards an intended goal.

Whether you are exercising to lose weight, gain weight, or just feel good, the very act of exercising takes the mind from the troubles of the day and helps you to focus on what you’re aiming towards.

My preferred exercise is yoga, because it involves a lot of “healthy mind, healthy body” type practices. It really helps me to focus on the present moment and learn to flourish into a more well-rounded and beautiful version of myself.

Exercise doesn’t have to mean hitting the gym or putting yourself into another situation that may induce more anxiety. It can be as easy as following a YouTube video at home, or going for a run around the neighborhood or your local forest preserve. There is always something that works for everyone.

3. Reduce That Caffeine Intake!!

Caffeine has been known to shake up the nerves and cause us to be more on edge, which is the last thing we want when anxiety hits. Caffeine can cause spurts of energy that lead to a major crash at the end of the day.

I’ve recently cut caffeine out of my diet. It took a while, due to my extreme obsession with coffee, but I got there. Now all of my coffee is ordered decaf!

You don’t have to completely cut it out of your diet, but trying to limit your intake can really have an effect on your mind-body experience. You may just find that you are having less anxiety when you’re not all hyped up on caffeine!

4. Talk Talk Talk

Because we tend to isolate ourselves when anxiety strikes, it is easy to develop a mindset that leads us to believe that we have to go through it alone. With almost 1/5 of the population struggling with the same thing, I can assure you that there are people out there that you can talk to, and who would gladly listen.

Explaining and really opening up to the people closest to you can feel like coming up for air after being under water for too long. It really is very therapeutic to talk things out. And the ones who love and care for you will be glad that you reached out.

Even if others cannot completely understand your situation, it is comforting to have someone listen and be there to support you.

5. Shift Your Thoughts

Anxiety always seems to have a strong hold on our minds. Sometimes, it makes the most insignificant problems seem like the most important thing in the world.

Another coping mechanism I’ve found to be helpful is to read about the things that inspire or awe you. Whenever I feel like my problems are crushing in on me, I go online and read about some of the amazing phenomenons of the world.

I read about space and time, mysteries of the past, and philosophies and teachings of old. These things really help put into perspective just how small and unimportant my problems really are. The school project we are stressing over, the date we are going on tomorrow, or the bill we might not pay on time are all laughable in the big scheme of things.

This method really helps me to open my mind and see the bigger picture. That no matter what happens, life goes on, time continues to pass, and I will make it through whatever obstacles come my way.

It helps my mind wander from the stresses of everyday life to a magic and wonder of this beautiful, mystical world that we live in. There is so much to think about, so practice thinking about the elegance of the world around us. This shifting of thought can form healthy habits of pushing away negative feelings and replacing them with positive ones.

6. Help Wanted

This is the step that most of us dread. It’s one thing to reach out to family or friends, and another to take it to a more serious level.

Getting the help that we need may sometimes mean stepping out of our comfort zones. And we all know that anxiety may inhibit us from taking that step. But it is so important to be able to put ourselves first and provide ourselves with the self-care that is needed in order to heal.

There is a negative stigma about going to see a therapist or a psychologist for help. There is this stigma, and I don’t quite understand why.

I want to be the first to say that it is ok to reach out for help. It is ok to go to a therapist. It is ok to talk to a psychologist about your anxiety. This doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you. It means that you are human. It means that you were brave enough to take the step towards bettering yourself. It means that you are determined to change the aspects in your life that no longer serve you.

And for that, I am here to say that I am proud of you. Because it is never easy to acknowledge that we need help, and it is even harder to take the necessary actions in order to get it. But it is so important that we get the help when we need it. Because there is a point in all of our lives when all we really need is a helping hand, and that’s nothing to ever be ashamed of.

 

I hope that this list can help you out in some way, and can also help you to understand that you are never alone on this journey. There are so many people out there who understand, in different variations, what you are going through.

There are going to be ups and downs, but take it one day at a time and focus on now. This is the only moment that matters and in this moment you are enough, with all of your beautiful imperfections.

Best of luck to you all!

Love,

Val